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The word "nostalgia" has its roots in the Greek language, specifically in the combination of two Greek words: "nostos" meaning "homecoming" and "algos" meaning "pain" or "ache." This original meaning of the word reflected a longing or yearning for one's homeland.
WikiEtymology
Growing up in the 2000s put me in a great spot: I inherited the optimistic and flashy nature of 90's culture, lived through a few years of the "free web", and got to enjoy those things with my friends, albeit shortly.
Obviously, at the time, we took it all for granted. I took everything for granted. As kids do.
When I think back on it, I realize how much I could've enjoyed that time more if I did this or that. I often fantasize about going back in time and taking advantage of those years to the fullest... but that's not very productive, is it.
It's nostalgia because it happened, and you can't change it. It's painful, but also beautiful.
But I'd like to shine light on another form of nostalgia. Not nostalgia about things you didn't do, or things you'd want to do again. But nostalgia, pain that comes from your origins, about the things you DID do. Regrets, and living with them.
Dìdi is about Chris, a teenager from an immigrant family growing up in 2000s USA. The story takes place in 2008, the age of MySpace and Facebook, of mainstream skateboarding, and the end of a prosperous era for working adults ― but of course, the financial crisis isn't addressed: this film is from the perspective of a teenager, after all.
Chris is at odds with his sister and his mom: in his eyes, they're obstacles to the things he wants to do. On the other hand, he takes some pride in his dad, who's abroad and making money for the family. He's an absent dad. But hey, he's not a hindrance at least!
Chris wants to skate because it's cool, he wants a girlfriend because, duh, guys want a girlfriend. He wants friends because you HAVE to be popular.
But he never thinks about what the people around him are going through. His mom is essentially a single parent, his sister is about to leave for college, and his friends are all going through teenagehood, just like him. But he's only really feeling HIS feelings, many of which he's encountering for the first time. Can you blame him for thinking he's the biggest victim of all time?
So he annoys his sister unprompted. He's mean to his loving mom. He's ungrateful. But as time goes and as he experiences new things, he slowly realizes his wrongdoings. As he lives through what seems like tragedies, each one feeling more awful than the last, he sees that life goes on.
Watching this made me feel so many things. Of course "cringe" is one of them: watching people do what they THINK is cool is extremely embarrassing. Chris's behavior mirrored my teenage behavior pretty accurately, though I wasn't AS much of a troublemaker (I was still shitty to my parents though!). I'm sure most guys can relate to the teenage experience of picking up hobbies to look cool or lying to impress friends or a girl. When you think back on it, it feels awful and cringey, but in the moment, it was natural, while being a desperate attempt to connect with others.
Dìdi is an ode to growth. It tells the story of losing one's innocence in exchange for an identity. It shows the missteps of youth, the common human experience of an awkward, in-between phase, and allows it to reside in us despite growing up. So that we can look back on it fondly later in life, and learn from our mistakes.
So though it pains me to think about how I used to act, I should strive to be proud of how I act now. A pre-teen isn't aware that they can become better for themselves. But we are.
We may sometimes find comfort in the stability of adulthood, but we should consciously look back on our worse moments and use those memories to grow even further.
Sep 19th, 2024
